BYU Studies Quarterly

BYU Studies Quarterly

Article Title



Cindy Gritton


Mormon studies, personal essay


Air—so tantalizingly close—remained painfully out of reach as I stared frantically up through the serene blueness of the swimming pool water. Such a beautiful color that blue was. Vivid and as permanently etched into my memory as thinking out what I would yell as soon as my head (hopefully) broke the surface of it one more time, because I knew I could only do it once more, knew it was a miracle I’d surfaced twice already, that after this next time, blue would turn to black and after that, I would not be walking home. “LET GO!” I screamed and sucked in that last, final, desperate breath of chlorine-scented air before I sank back down and into blackness.